Responsible Parenting-2-Set Personal Example
This is the second blog in the series of ‘Responsible Parenting’. The most important issue we had identified was to have total faith in our children. I find a large number of parents lacking in this. The second important issue is to set a personal example. Indian parents are quite fond of micro managing the lives of children and hence keep guiding them on the smallest of issues. This helps very little. Personal example set by actions influences the conduct of children greatly.
Attitudinal Problem of Child or Parents?
While I worked in a golf course a lot many parents shared with me a common concern. The concern was that the children valued other children based on the wealth that their parents possessed, rather than their qualities. Probably the parents did not realize that this attitude of their children was shaped totally by them. The parents valued people based on their material possessions and financial success. The children most naturally did the same! When some of the parents asked me as to what they should do, I always told them to do nothing with the children, but just change their own attitude. Most of them did not take the advice because they wrongly believed that the problem was with the children, whereas the problem was actually with them! Interestingly this problem did not exist in the children of the rich, but down to earth parents.
Parents Provide Leadership for Children
Whether you are good, bad, or indifferent as a leader at work place, at home every parent is a leader for the child. Children do follow the example set by parents. If you start observing minutely and then questioning you will find that grown up people do not have any logical explanation for several senseless things that they do, except that they inherited the attitude, mannerisms, or way of doing things from their parents.
Responsible Parents set Personal Example
Parents should realize that they have the tremendous responsibility of influencing the lives of their children. They can do it positively or negatively not by their words but their actions. Some core and quite stable character qualities like integrity, determination and discipline of children are greatly influenced by parents. This phenomenon occurs unconsciously for the parents as well as the children. Since this is universally true, we should realize that as responsible parents we must set personal examples for the children to follow.
Note: In the next blog in the series we shall discuss the third most important lesson for parents: “Don’t control the lives of Children”.