Unconditional Love Part-2
Concept is being explained further. Please remember that when we communicate our body language is more important than our words. If a parent is indulgent-allows his child, or supports him in wrong doings, he is trying to be popular with the child for his short term, selfish interest, which will be at the expense of correct guidance to the child. In case the parent is harsh & forces a child to behave the way he wants, without reasoning with him, again there would be resentment caused in the child, which will adversely affect the relationship.
Example to Explain Unconditional Love
Let us take an example. You are a rich man & your son is playing cricket with a group of servants’ children & you are watching. Your son cheats in a way that he keeps batting while the other children keep bowling & fielding, (which they protest & do not want to play with your son). As indulgent parent you order the other children to continue playing & tell them that your son is not cheating. (You have become popular with your son in the short term, but you have encouraged him to become a selfish rogue in the future-harming his development into a good person). He knows that you will support his future similar acts as well! (Remember the Dhritrashtra-Duryodhan relationship!).
As a strict & fair person, more concerned about your reputation with the group of children, than the growth of your child, you get annoyed (because your son’s behavior has embarrassed you). Your body language is no more communicating love. You publicly order your son that he is out & other children should bat & he should ball & field. In this manner you may have done justice, but adversely affected your relationship with the child. He will resent you & will not seek your advice & will avoid you.
As a mature parent you are concerned with the child’s growth & love him as well. You do not take this behavior of his, to change your attitude towards him. You continue to love him, just the same. You call your son to you & tell him privately that he was out & he should play fair, without any public admonishment. Since your body language is (of unconditional love), and reasoning is fair, the child will not only listen to you, your relationship would remain good, & child’s growth positively promoted. He will also get the lesson that you are fair in dealings, & he should emulate you.
I hope this explanation adequately explains the value of unconditional love in promoting a child’s growth!